Travelling in the van to Bangkok

1st January, 2010

Dear Reader

Unlike the end of 2009 when my well of words seemed dry as all my energy went into processing the sights and sounds around me, I feel energised by the past twenty four hours and wish to share my thoughts and feelings as we head back into Bangkok just before noon on this precious first day of the new decade.

Jan and I are being driven back in the comfortable eleven seater, natural gas fuelled Toyota van, fuelled by natural gas, by the driver who has safely chauffeured us for the past ten days, while the rest of Alisa’s family will be driven by Pat, Alisa’s father, back to their home in Khon Kaen.  Jan has just told me that, although he found some of the destinations boring, he loved all the people we met, and that meant more to him than seeing the sights.  Wise words for a teenager. However, for Jan, still a teenager at sixteen years of age, shopping is still his top priority, and I am delighted that we can have the last 24 hours in Thailand in his shopping heaven!  We will return to the Siam Centre, MBK, where Jan can buy his last presents for family and friends, and we are looking forward to catching up with Chris and Karina who no doubt have wonderful stories to tell us as well.  Jan and I have picked up Thai relatively easily, having spent every day with our generous friends who patiently repeated phrases, and praised us for our halting sentences.  For me, relating to the people of a country is what gives me the greatest pleasure, and being given the privilege of sharing the lives of Alisa’s extended family was the highlight of Jan and my time in Thailand, not forgetting the buzz that Jan has got out of the shopping opportunities!

As we head into the centre of Bangkok, I am reminded of Jan’s amazement at the volume of traffic, which clogged the highways on our arrival in Bangkok.  Alisa’s father and driver met us, and immediately took us to a parking building which seemed to stretch for miles.  The Asian heat was evident, and the “winter warmth” of 26 degrees agreed with me.  Stuck in a traffic jam meant that our arrival at our hotel was delayed about one hour, but we quickly checked in, and I could sense Jan’s impatience to explore this shopping mecca.  We walked across the bridge famous for its elephant statues, and we noticed that numbers were written in chalk on one of the pillars.  Alisa’s brother told us that the digits 28 were the number of people killed on the bridge, but we later worked out that it was some kind of mathematical equation that people did on this bridge.  We thought we only had time to dip our toes into the sea of consumerism as we passed seller sitting on the overbridges selling their wares, but the huge shopping mall of MBK beckoned us, and our host led us to the second floor where Jan and Chris became the attention of Mike, a smooth talking Nepalese salesman.  An hour later, while my film was being developed, the two men were measured for suits and shirts, and negotiated a great deal which had them both smiling. Jan had been determined to buy a tailored suit in Bangkok, and his dream quickly came true. Not only was Jan determined to dress to impress, but the city was dressed to the nines for Christmas, with huge Christmas trees twinkling in the warm, welcoming night.  We headed to the a big department store where we met three of our school agents, and I treated the party of fourteen people to a delicious dinner as we looked over  a pond which reflected the fairy lights of the city.  Masy, one of our friends who is an agent, cynically said that consumerism was the only driving force behind the Christmas decorations, but I appreciated the effort taken, and the atmosphere reminded me that indeed Christmas was approaching in three days.  Jan and Chris excused themselves soon after the meal finished as they had to return to Mike for a final fitting, and our host kindly showed them the way back through the maze of shops and people.  They were told their suits would be ready in eight hours, and when we returned the following day, two film stars were born, with all the confidence that good clothing gives one.  “Clothes maketh the man,” is a saying which has survived through time with good reason!

Bangkok seduces the consumer into parting with their money in a way which makes one think they are making money by getting a bargain.  I smiled as an initially hesitant son became adept at bargaining, getting great deals, or so we think!  Having Thai nationals on hand certainly helped to gauge if the deal had been good or not! Our second evening, the adventurous four headed out on our own, and discovered a wonderful restaurant on the opposite side of the road from our hotel.  Chris, who found the Thai taste for chilli too hot, ordered beef without spice, and I ordered a fish dish which looked like it would have some fire to it.  Having downed a few beers, the first time I had actually sat down for a relaxing beer on the trip, we were told that the beef wasn’t available but the pork was. This didn’t prove to be a problem until the pork and rice dish arrived full of chilli, and my dish turned out to be more of a Chinese dish with no fire in it at all.  Poor Chris nearly died as the power of the pepper contorted his face, and although sympathetic in principle, we couldn’t contain our laughter.  Why does one laugh in such situations?  We swapped meals, and he ended the evening happily.  We returned to the hotel in time to have a much longed for swim in the pool on the twelfth floor of the hotel.  Only open between 7:00am and 9:00pm, I appreciated the fact that we caught a tuktuk to our hotel, navigating the traffic to arrive safely in time for a refreshing dip.  The hotel swimming pools are usually empty, and as I looked up at the night sky, I felt in seventh heaven as I recalled the amazing day we had had.

At the beginning of our second day in Bangkok, Alisa’s father, Pat, and his right hand man, Dong, met us in the hotel lobby after a delicious buffet breakfast in the hotel.  Jan and I love fruit, and enjoyed the fresh watermelon and pineapple which marked the start of a perfect day.  With Pat and Dong, we had no need to think of our route to the sightseeing wonders of the city, but just followed along behind as we soaked up the sights of the city.  Waiting for the sky train, I noticed a ghost-like building which had perhaps become a victim of a fire, when the recession of the mid nineties may have immobilised reconstruction of its upper floors. The recession hit more than just buildings, and our host talked about his company, which had boasted a turnover of over 50 million baht, becoming  another victim of the vicious vagaries of the recession, resulting in bankruptcy and a $12million baht loss.  I admire the tenacity of the self made millionaire who has built up another company to produce a $1million dollar profit this year, as he comes closer to his goal of paying off his creditors within the next ten years.  We talked about the need to think and act positively in business, and Pat reinforced for me the incredible power of remaining fixed on one’s goals and reaching them.  We stopped in to see one of his offices on the outskirts of Bangkok, a busy office in a residential street which had been a dwelling for a family until renovated to house the twenty employees in the conveyor belt business.  It was a Saturday morning when we were invited to look around his new suite of offices, and about a dozen staff were having professional development with a powerpoint presentation, and Pat talked about the value of continuing to educate his workforce.  He also believes, as I do, that your staff are your most valuable asset, and he takes about a dozen of them abroad every year, to Vietnam or neighbouring Laos, to broaden their cultural horizons. 

On plane to Brunei Darussalem

2nd January, 2010

My laptop is again my best flight friend as I fly over south east Asian countries on our way from Bangkok to Brunei.  The flight attendants on this Royal Brunei flight are much more attentive than the flight staff who did their perfunctory duty on our way out to Brunei and Bangkok from New Zealand.  On our other flights, there was only one woman on each flight, whereas two women and one man look after us on this first three hour leg.  The meal, unlike our last meal, was edible although nothing to write home about, but the flight attendant was convivial and made me feel welcome.  He engaged in conversation, and Jan had me on for “chatting him up.”  I laughed and was reminded that I haven’t even seen one man who took my fancy at all.  Most of the male tourists in Bangkok were with their partners, (female or male,) or overweight, older men with much younger Thai women, sometimes with children in tow.  None appealed, naturally.  My daughter’s wish for me to “have a pash at midnight on New Year’s Eve” certainly didn’t come to pass, and in fact my evening was far from romantic.  It would have to be the first New Year’s Eve when I only had a couple of glasses of wine through the course of the evening, and spent the countdown with Jan and a fascinating older Thai woman who could become a very good friend of mine.  Although it was a quiet welcoming of 2010, I really felt content to be in nature with fabulous newly found friends, and my youngest son.  The first day of the 2010 was absolutely perfect for both Jan and me as we had been blessed to have been welcomed into Alisa’s family, and they made our first hours of the new year so special with a wonderful breakfast together near a waterfall.  I took a photo of a Buddha as we were leaving, and felt that a higher spirit was looking after us.

Visiting temples is something that I always do when I travel through Asia, as I see them as a quiet place of solace, a retreat from the hustle and bustle of the big cities.  The big temples are always so filled with people that it is hard to use them as a place of contemplation, and the big temples of Bangkok are no exception.  However, if you are so close to marvels of the world, it seems beholden on the traveller to experience the wonder of such places.  It was almost the case that the Jade temple, a “must see” for tourists, wasn’t seen by Jan as he at first resisted paying the entrance fee which foreigners had to pay, but which was at a minimal price for the Thai nationals.  I had seen the King’s palace when I visited Bangkok on my honeymoon seven years ago, but I am always happy to revisit places which show the power of human endeavour.  Realising that this was a national treasure, Jan agreed that a visit was indeed worth it, and asked if Dong could show us around. After Karina and I borrowed a shirt cover our arms, we were escorted around the heavenly temples, and sat in the Jade temple to admire the illuminated Jade Buddha.  Naturally, hundreds of others also sat in respect, but not in silence, so there was no opportunity for quiet reflection or prayer for me as I used to have in China. 

Disembarking from the ferry, in the heat of the day, we walked from the train station past street sellers, and the occasional beggar, but it was a woman with two small boys who caught my eye.  She was sitting proudly feeding her son, a few trinkets for sale in front of her.  I knelt down and looked at the nickel coin shaped pendants with figures of different monks, and I asked Dong which Buddha I should choose.  Only one monk was from the eastern province, and he granted wishes to believers.  I decided to buy it, and gave the woman the 50 baht without bargaining.  Later, I saw piles of them for 5baht, but I am sure there wasn’t another one as special as mine.  This mother was happy for me to take a photo of her and her children as she sat on the pavement, and the photo I have of the family of three is one of my favourite photos taken.  (I have had all fourteen rolls of film developed in Thailand, and I treasure them all.)

We reached the Reclining Buddha by taking a ferry up river,  and around any tourist attraction, the hawkers are out to sell their wares, and fan shaped hats, silk paintings, umbrellas, postcards, and anything that could possibly fetch a price are thrust at you by eager sellers.  The women will claim it is “for the baby,” no matter what age she is, and the men just tell you they have the best price.  Jan entered into the spirit of bargaining, although reserved his most vociferous bargaining for the Bangkok MBK!  Entering the precinct of the Reclining Buddha, we quickly retreated into the hallowed temple which housed this golden treasure in its cool interior.  I was able to take some amazing photos which captured the magnificence of the golden Buddha, but as we re-emerged from the temple, Dong asked if we had understood.  This man knew a lot about the Buddha, and it was only much later that we learnt that he had been a monk, but had to leave the order to support his family.  Dong struck us all as a man with special qualities, an inner calm which enabled him to remain at peace under any situation.  Being Pat’s right arm man, he became our constant guide and companion, and on hearing of his devotion to Buddhism, it made sense that he had given himself to a higher order, and we respected him all the more.  Jan placed a coin in each of the 108 pots which lined a wall beside the great Buddha as a sign of good luck, and we felt at peace as we re-emerged.  We were thrown back into reality when we heard an American young woman refuse to cover her shoulders as was required as a sign of respect, and I wondered what value such people gained by visiting these hallowed places.  Jan discovered” ma moung priauw,” a sour mango which was cut up and put in a plastic bag to be eaten with a thin skewer.  The mango is dipped in a chili, salt and sugar mix before being put in the mouth where the senses are assaulted by a bombardment of different taste sensations! Jan and I both went up and asked in Thai for the zingy treat, and we had that wonderful feeling of achievement at having made ourselves understood.  Such occasions are valuable lessons for me in remembering the enormous struggle it is for students of English to communicate, and the affirming feel one receives when one is understood and praised for making the effort. 

We passed more street hawkers selling fresh fruit juices, and we tried red roselle and dragon fruit, both of which I liked, which was just as well as the taste didn’t appeal to Jan.  Boarding a crowded ferry, I took a photo of three monks, one of whom was engrossed in a book.  The monks hold such an honored place in this society, and the neighbourhood altars are a sign of the strength of the common person’s faith.  Photos of the King are everywhere, testament to the power of the king, and in talking with the people, there is enormous love and respect for him as well.  Before he came to power, no man would wear a pink shirt, but because it is the King’s favourite colour and he wears it often, pink is the colour of choice for many men.  Alisa’s uncle, the former governor of the ninth largest province in Thailand with a population of over 2 million, was a wonderful host who wore pink every day, and we enjoyed hours just talking in the garden of his gracious house.  Both he and his brother have houses with teak floors, and an outside area for the kitchen and dining area.  The former governor, endearingly called Pi Sem, (uncle Sem) and his wife Pi Ba, had a teak pavilion with large carved seats where one could sit to escape the heat. Their house was filled with photos of the couple and their three children, and the unused inner kitchen had baskets of gifts from well-wishers as is the New Year tradition.  The houses have a very different feel from our homes, where people live outside more than they do inside, and where walls are for photos, but not so much for works of art.  Lizards crawl up the outside walls, and there were frogs which came out at night.  The tropics evoked the  stories of Somerset Maugham in me, and I imagined sipping pink gins on the verandah.  However, Alisa’s mother made sure that her husband drank little, as he was a diabetic, and told her governor brother that he shouldn’t drink either as his latest tests showed deterioration of his liver.  Only the women were able to drink on New Year’s Eve, and then only a little, so it was the first time in many years that I welcomed in the New Year totally sober!!

I pray that this year, 2010, brings days filled with sunshine, if not in the sky then in our hearts, and lots of laughter.  I read over the letter I wrote at this time last year, and I am amazed at how different my life is from what I had expected.  However, I do believe that we are shown new paths in our lives when the time is right, and I am now content to follow the, as yet, uncharted way. Han sent me a New Year greeting in reply to mine, and he said that he was saddened to read my email on a day when he was constructing a fence which will divide the property which we worked so hard to create.  Life is never predictable, but we just have to make sure that we face all the challenges positively and move on.  May the power of positive attraction be with us all.

Love 

Sharron